Suspended

  

By: Henry Melville

Simply put: Stop using the word “suspenseful” to describe 99% of horror movies.

Take for example, that generic horror movie coming out this month (regardless of when this is being read) about either possession, a haunting, or a psychopathic killer which may or may not involve a “creepy” child. Without fail, that movie will contain the following scene:

The movie’s heroine walks down a narrow hall or alley as the camera slowly pans away from the wall and begins to turn and hint at what’s waiting for her in the upcoming corner. An eerie, ambient note is heard under the heavy breathing and footsteps of the sweaty, promiscuously-clad actress. As soon as she hesitates to turn the corner, all noise stops (yes, even the footsteps as she keeps walking).

One beat.

Loud noise. This is accompanied by one of two things. One, the villain, ghost, or horror that the movie is centered on appearing behind that dark corner, or, two, something that causes the girl (and audience) to jump, breathe a sigh of relief and then:

One beat.

Loud noise. Then the horror of the movie comes from behind them or anywhere else “unexpected.”

This is not suspense. Suspense isn’t not knowing what’s around the corner, but knowing what is and not being able to stop it. The irrefutable master of suspense, Alfred Hitchcock, gained that title because of one of the most iconic scenes in cinema history: the Psycho shower scene. In the hands of a lesser director, or screenwriter even, the audience would be unaware of the silhouetted knife inching closer to the curtain. Janet Leigh would be gleefully bathing until she heard a noise. Her smile would drop and her head would turn. Hesitantly she’d return to her shower head, a little more on edge than before.

One beat.

Loud noise followed by the knife entering the curtain. This is not successful suspense. It is a shock. It’s startling, but not suspenseful. The reason I haven’t been able to close my eyes for more than thirty seconds in the shower isn’t because of a jump-scare I was given as a kid, but, as a kid, I endured the long, horrific, suspenseful shower scene and could do nothing to stop what I knew was coming.  If the first was true, I would be afraid of laundry hampers because of the time my brother hid in one and scared me.

Don’t call a movie scary because it made you jump out of your seat. That’s simply human nature to react to a loud noise, there is nothing psychological to it. Being afraid to look out your window for fear of seeing Michael Meyers across the street, that’s scary. A horror films “longevity” should be judged differently than other genres. It is more than, “does this film hold up.” The film should have a vice-like grip of fear over you long after the credits roll. The annual Halloween viewing of Halloween proves this to me as I walk to my car, feel my heart pound more erratically than normal, and walk faster. I'm not afraid of not knowing what's in my backseat, but knowing that he's back there…waiting…while I sit in the driver seat anyway.

One beat.

Two beats.

Three beats.

I turn the keys in the ignition and prepare for the sleepless night.

The Lesser Knowns: Lost in the Fog

By: Henry Melville

 

    A limpid fog … exists … outside your car windows. Up ahead you make out a fork in the road. On the right you see a glow of light that reads “vacancy.” Above that reads Bates Motel. You turn left. A sign reads “Welcome to Whitewood,” you pass a church and stumble upon The Raven’s Inn. And as luck has it, there is one more vacancy left just for you. Preparing for bed, you open the bedside drawer and discover an impaled crow. You hear music, chanting, coming from under the floorboards. Today is Candlemas Eve. The holiday of the witches.

    What makes Psycho a near perfect movie is the craft, skill, and intelligence that went into making the film. It's Hitchcock, but it isn't a classic horror. What Horror Hotel lacked in symbolism, Psycho lacked in atmosphere. Satan’s on earth and he lives in Whitewood, the only evil in Bates Motel is Norman. Black shrouds, gothic architecture, graveyards, Christopher Lee, crypts. Horror cliché’s stem from this hardly known nightmare.

So next time you turn around an old lady on a chair, don’t expect Mother. It might just be the burnt corpse of a hundred year old witch looking for her next sacrifice. As for me, I’ll be expecting Vera Miles.

    Psycho came out August 25th 1960. Audiences everywhere were shocked when their heroine was slaughtered in the first thirty minutes. What next? Where was Hitchcock taking them? The reaction to Psycho, like a tidal wave, crashed on the shores and destroyed beach houses. Less than one month later, September 12th 1960, Horror Hotel does not shock or horrify when the heroine is brutally sacrificed in the first thirty minutes of the film. What next? “Who cares, I’ve already seen this in Psycho, let’s just leave this rip-off movie.” Oh, but if they had stayed! Burning witches, satanic rituals, ghosts, animal sacrifices. All done in a pitch-perfect horror film style. And what rip-off could this film be? Production on Horror Hotel started before Psycho. How the two films can have such eerily similar elements and even shot for shot, identical scenes is beyond me. Perhaps, beyond this world.

    Censorship! Psycho came under controversy for its showing of an unmarried man and woman sharing a bed, dressed and for showing blood. Let me remind you that witches are burnt, engulfed in flames alive, in Horror Hotel. If that was not shot down by the conservative 1960s “man,” what could be? Three lines. The censors cut three lines. Language? Not exactly. "I have made my pact with thee O Lucifer! Hear Me, Hear Me! I will do thy bidding for all eternity. For all eternity shall I practice the ritual of Black Mass. For all eternity shall I sacrifice unto thee. I give thee my soul, take me into thy service." A witch screams this as she is being burned alive, flames overtaking the scene. 1960 was not ready for this, but they were ready for Psycho.

    Psycho can be found on any “Top 100” list related to films. Psycho was given a blu-ray release on it’s 50th anniversary. Horror Hotel can be found at your local Walmart cheap DVD bin, or the whole movie can be seen on Youtube.